Max Payne

Based on the 2001-hit videogame Max Payne the film follows DEA agent Max’s (Mark Wahlberg) desperate attempt to find the killers of his wife and daughter.

Max now working in the ‘Cold Case’ department of the NYPD discovers that the case involving his wife’s killing involves a much deeper conspiracy. The US military had signed a contract with Aesir Pharmaceuticals to develop a serum to boost its men morale in the fight against terrorism. But the drug failed with only one man reacting positively, so the military scrapped the project. However, Max’s father ex-partner B B Hensley (Beau Bridges) tried to profit from it by selling the serum as a drug. That’s when Max’s wife came in the way of B B. Max looking for a lead unintentionally bump into Natasha Sax (Olga Kurylenko, the sexy lady in the latest Bond film Quantum of Solace) in a club. She tries to seduce him but Max throws her out only to find that she would soon become another victim of the ‘gang’. Then Max and Natasha’s sister Mona Sax (Mila Kunis) join hand to have their revenge.

Mark looks comfortable as the hardened man whose only purpose of living was revenge. Mila Kunis is a perfect accomplice but Olga Kurylenko is totally wasted even in her appearance as a seductive drug addict for about 5 minutes.

Die-hard fans of the game must have been eagerly waiting for this film but ‘disappointment’ is a word many have to accept when it comes to the film’s lifeline — the script. The storytelling is painfully slow, considering it is an action movie. There are devils, fires, sparks and bad boys who are not well explained. For instance, the question on Mila’s life, who she really is and what she does, remain a puzzle. Even the numerous flashbacks do help much. On many occasions, the film almost falls apart but the cinematography and some stylish action scenes literally keep it afloat.

Overall, Max Payne is watchable only for its star presence, action cuts, sound effects and to satisfy your curiosity.
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Max Payne
English (A)
Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, Beau Bridges, Olga Kurylenko
Director: John Moore

Killer English!!!

Enough scope for fun in English even when it is wrongly used. Here are some sentences which a friend of mine forwarded me today.

Principal to student..." I saw u yesterday rotating near girls hostel
pulling cigerette... ? "

Class teacher once said: "pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!"

Once Hindi teacher said: I'm going out of the world to America.."
"..Don't try to talk in front of my back."
Don't....augh at the back benches... otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down.....

It was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. She tried to switch the fan on, but there was some problem. and then she said, " Why is fan not oning" (ing form of on)

Teacher in a furious mood: "write down ur name and father of ur name!!!"
"Shhh... quiet... the principal is revolving around college."

My manager started like this:
"Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids"
"I'll illustrate what i have in my mind" said the professor and erased the board"
"will u hang that calender or else i'll HANG MYSELF"

Librarian scolded: "If you will talk again, I will kneel down outside."

Chemistry HOD comes and tells us: "My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter"
"Tomorrow call ur parents especially mother and father."
"Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!"

Lab assistant said this when my friend wrote wrong code: "I understand. You understand. Computer how understand??

Seing the principal passing by, the teacher told the noisy class: "Keep quiet, the principal has passed away"

Death Race

The post-industrial economic crisis in the US provides ample ground for the business savvy woman-warden of the dreaded Terminal Island Prison to turn the place into a money minting place. She pitted inmates against each others in a deadly car race which is broadcasted as “Death Race” to the world via a paysite on the internet. The winner, if there is, any at all, could win his freedom after going through the final stage!

Jensen (Statham) a decent husband and father is framed for murder and sent to Terminal Island prison. The warden (Allen) offers Jensen his freedom if he beats challenger Joe (Gibson). But Jensen thinks that he had met another competitor (Ryan) somewhere before he landed in the prison cell. So with his racing coach (McShane) and bombshell navigator (Martinez), Jensen trumps up an escape plan even as the race takes place under the watchful eyes of the prison warden.

Death Race is full of deafening roar of the cars, big guns and even bigger explosions. Statham looks astonishingly cool in his well toned muscles and sexy Martinez keeps you glue to the screen. The jaw-dropping car chase scenes and actions resemble the making of another part of The Fast and the Furious but with poor scripting and messy editing Death Race looks more of a videogame masquerading as a movie. There is too much special effects that the film could use toons and not actors.

Death Race is a mockery of the 1975-original film, but it delivers extreme fury and action to ensure that it remains entertaining if you deactivate your brainpower.
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English (A)
Cast: Jason Statham, Joan Allen, Ian McShane, Tyrese Gibson, Natalie Martinez
Director: Paul W S Anderson

Embracing male sexuality

Gentlemen: A Lighter Look at the Male Viewpoint
Author: Anil Abraham, Unisun, 2008, pp 90, Rs 150

Bangalore-based doctor Anil Abraham’s Gentlemen is a sidesplitting monologue on the Indian male psychic on sexual transformation. If you have seen the classic play of Eve Ensler’s The Vagina Monologues, you’ll find that you have been to similar grounds. Gentlemen traces the four stages of sexual identification process of the Indian male, particularly that of a South Indian, in a pleasurable way minus vulgarity.

The monologues are divided into five parts — four on men themselves and one by a woman. The first one called ‘The Impotence of Being Earnest’ concentrates on a gentleman’s horror at the realisation that his ‘Mohanlal’ had betrayed him on the night of his marriage to a ‘complete stranger’, despite him having had a ‘hard’ and ‘healthy’ life all through.

Then we have ‘Fiddler on the Roof’ in which a budding young man instead of playing violin plays with his stuff at the discovery of his sexual identity on a rooftop. There’s a lot to look back and grind at the little home-truths here.

Now, a sexually active married man in ‘The Last of the Red-Hot Lovers’ hits out at the ‘needless’ condom. There are some catchy dialogues like “When there is rain an umbrella is OK. But what’s love with a condom? Don’t you think it’s a little out-of place?”

Finally ‘To Pee or not to Pee’ is a satire on the dysfunctional of men’s ‘most guarded tool’. It’s a story about an aged man and how he had to deal with his ever youthful mischievous mind.

Dr Abraham then chooses to have a ‘happily ever after’ play with a no-nonsense woman in ‘Who’s Afraid of Vagina Wolf?” What’s life without women after all? This section serves as a reminder to all men that with all their machismo, by being born the way they are, their ultimate happiness lies with words like Men-struation, Men-opause and finally Wo-men!

This book maybe small but the issue it contains is much bigger than the phallus — men’s ‘most guarded element’. It is a candid take on men’s sexuality which rarely gets into Indian performing arts and public discussion. Even as the dermatologist in Abraham brings out the often regarded taboo topic in a refined manner the teacher in him equally tackles the issue without impropriety.
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